The Boy Who Has Everything

The Boy Who Has Everything


Our friends and family seemed to get a good chuckle out of this story, so I thought I would pass it on to our readers to lighten the Christmas spirit.

It is no secret to anyone that the holidays can be an extremely stressful time of year. Deciding what gifts to purchase for the special people in your life is often a daunting task, and if you come from a creative family, slipping a gift card into an envelope just won’t do. My husband and I typically strive to “wow” our recipients through emotion and memories by passing along a well thought out gift directly from our hearts. No matter how difficult this process becomes for each person on our list, one thing is for sure, buying gifts for children is by far the most fun and exciting.

Unfortunately this is not the case for our brilliantly inventive seven-year-old son. This is the type of kid who has a million toys (some of which he just discovered from Christmas last year) yet surrounds himself with Legos, markers, and paper in order to create anything that pops into his tiny head. He has been known to dig through our recycling bin in search of cardboard boxes and tin cans and has raided our woodpile all in the name of building sculptures for his action figures to battle on (of course with guns and slingshots made of rubber bands and pipe cleaners).

So with Christmas right around the corner, his father asked him what he would like Santa to bring this year. His responses are something straight out of a Spielberg movie.

“I want a big, round, alien space ship with an alien… and the space ship will have an opening in the middle where the alien can go down into the space ship.”

Um, okay. We asked him to think of something a little less specific just in case “Santa” could not deliver this request. Mind you, last year he asked for a skeleton alien with red eyes, a black cape, and a gun. After searching all over God’s creation for something that clearly did not exist, we settled on an alien action figure straight from the movie, Alien. I have not seen that toy since he opened it on Christmas morning. Surely it is shoved under the bed or beneath the stack of other toys that have not lived up to his standards.

His second choice was even more exuberant.

“Okay. I want a big dinosaur with a guy who can sit inside of him… and the dinosaur has things that come out of his chest and can walk around.”

Mind blown. Upon hearing this and looking at him like a deer in headlights, we naturally asked him if this is a toy that he has seen somewhere. Without having cable, therefore rarely exposing him to commercials, we hoped that he might have trotted past this in a store somewhere. Give us some kind of direction, kid! Alas, he admitted that he made it up. With a deep sigh from his parental figures and carefully chosen words, we told him that Santa’s elves may not know how to make these toys, at least not yet. He growled, visibly appeared teary eyed, and shouted, “Well, I like machines!”

So, after further explanation, he settled with, “Fine. Then just a dinosaur and a guy,” and threw his hands up in a disgruntled huff of disgust.

With a few weeks left until Christmas, the search for the perfect gift for our inventive child continues. The hours spent perusing and a plethora of unique toy stores and online websites has failed to deliver what has been created in the mind of our child. As we prepare ourselves for another morning of disappointment, we are honestly considering stuffing his stocking with bottle caps and paperclips.

Perhaps a gift card to Home Depot will have to do.