— by Emily Truman/Matt Kabik
What is your full-time job?
I’m a business-to-business copywriter for an ad agency.
What is the first thing you do when you get home from a long day?
If we’re looking for the most consistent thing I do when I get home from a long day, I’d say it’d be taking off my pants. Pants are leg prisons.
Do you have any quirky daily rituals?
I don’t think so. I mean, I haven’t lived as another person so who knows what’s quirky and what isn’t? I’m a pretty normal person, day-to-day.
What makes life joyful for you?
My job. It’s rare that someone gets to do what they really want to for a career. But here I am.
Alternate answer: Trying to convince people they shouldn’t strive to be mindlessly happy all the time.
What is your favorite subject to write about?
I get a kick out of writing either apocalyptic stories (tiny apocalypses – not worldwide ones), or writing really upsetting speculative fiction. I don’t really write either of those regularly, so they hit the tongue like a treat.
What is your motto?
Everyone is fighting a battle they will eventually lose. That or: there is always room for ice cream – but for the same reason as the first motto I listed.
What famous movie actor would play you in their feature film?
What special skills do you have that few people know about?
I have a skill at making men’s grooming products, and can wield an axe proficiently.
If you could rewrite the quote for underneath your senior picture, what would it be now?
In 10 or 12 years, I’ll be more attractive than I appear above.